a story worth reading

here’s a story i received in an email, and i wanted to share it.

 

 

Freedom and I have been together 10 years this summer. She came in as a baby in 1998 with two broken wings. Her left wing doesn’t open all the way even after surgery, it was broken in 4 places. She’s my baby.

Jeff

When Freedom came in she could not stand.  Both wings were broken, her left wing in 4 places. She was emaciated and covered in lice. We made the decision to give her a chance at life, so I took her to the vet’s office.  From then on, I was always around her. We had her in a huge dog carrier with the top off, and it was loaded up with shredded newspaper for her to lay in. I used to sit and talk to her, urging her to live, to fight; and she would lay there looking at me with those big brown eyes. We also had to tube feed her for weeks.

This went on for 4-6 weeks, and by then she still couldn’t stand. It got to the point where the decision was made to euthanize her if she couldn’t stand in a week. You know you don’t want to cross that line between torture and rehab, and it looked like death was winning. She was going to be put down that Friday, and I was supposed to come in on that Thursday afternoon. I didn’t want to go to the center that Thursday, because I couldn’t bear the thought of her being euthanized; but I went anyway, and when I walked in everyone was grinning from ear to ear. I went immediately back to her dowl cage; and there she was, standing on her own, a big beautiful eagle.  She was ready to live. I was just about in tears by then. That was a very good day.

We knew she could never fly, so the director asked me to glove train her. I got her used to the glove, and then to jesses, and we started doing education programs for schools in western Washington. We wound up in the newspapers, radio (believe it or not) and some TV.  Miracle Pets even did a show about us.

In the spring of 2000, I was diagnosed with non-hodgkins lymphoma. I had stage 3, which is not good (one major organ plus everywhere), so I wound up doing 8 months of chemo. Lost the hair - the whole bit. I missed a lot of work.  When I felt good enough, I would go to Sarvey & take Freedom out for walks.  Freedom would also come to me in my dreams and help me fight the cancer.  This happened time & time again.  

Fast forward to November 2000, the day after Thanksgiving, I went in for my last checkup. I was told that if the cancer was not all gone after 8 rounds of chemo, then my last option was a stem cell transplant.  Anyway, they did the tests; and I had to come back Monday for the results.  I went in Monday and I was told that all the cancer was gone.  Yahoo!    

So the first thing I did was get up to Sarvey and take the big girl out for a walk. It was misty and cold. I went to her flight and jessed her up, and we went out front to the top of the hill. I hadn’t said a word to Freedom, but somehow she knew. She looked at me and wrapped both her wings around me to where I could feel them pressing in on my back (I was engulfed in eagle wings), and she touched my nose with her beak and stared into my eyes, and we just stood there like that for I don’t know how long. That was a magic moment. We have been soul mates ever since she came in. This is a very special bird.

On a side note, I have had people who were sick come up to us  when we are out, & Freedom has some kind of hold on them.  I once had a guy who was terminal come up to us & I  let him hold her. His knees just about buckled and he swore he could feel her power coarse through his body. I have so many stories like that.  I never forget the honor I have of being so close to such a magnificent spirit as Freedom’s.

Hope you enjoy this.

google Tags: eagle, freedom

a taxing ordeal

indeed, it has been a taxing experience. easter weekend was fine, and then monday i started my tax returns. i have used turbotax for the past two years, and everything was fine. but this year i had a problem. i had completed both federal and state taxes, and was looking to get a nice return, including the $600 rebate everyone gets this year. ‘time to file’ the program said. you have to pay first, so i paid. ‘oops! we have some errors to address before we can file electronically’. huh? ok …

then began the nightmare. i was taken back to the forms for my HSA account, and told if i override the pre calculated entries i cant file electronically. why wasnt i informed of that first? ok, so i canceled the override, my return was reduced to less than the rebate. i tried redoing the whole medical section. several times. every time i got a different amount due back, or sometimes an amount owed. i finally decided to clear it and start over, but i had already paid so i couldnt. i decided to opt for a refund, which for the software you are given 60 days in which to request one. if you do the online version, as i had, you cant have a refund. by paying, you are stating you are completely satisfied with the program, and no refund is given.

well i was satisfied at the time i paid. it wasnt until i tried to file electronically that i was told there were errors that needed to be addressed. or i could print everything, and mail it as is. i wanted to e-file, so i followed the program to the pages to be fixed, and thats when all the trouble started.

two days i tried to work it out, but i was unable to fix whatever was wrong. i was also unable to go back far enough to address other questions that perhaps were entered wrongly. by now i was getting really stressed.

yesterday i called the 1-800 number, explained the problem, and was refunded my payment. i was also given a reference number, since i was at work when i called, so i can call back when im home and can pick up where i left off.

i dont get really stressed like that very often. i should have put it all in Gods hands at the very beginning. duh.  but better late than never. i will get my taxes filed, and i know i will get a nice return this year. i have my peace back, and thats more important than anything.

google Tags: taxes

i hope you dance

This  was written by an 83-year-old woman to her friend. 

*The  last line says it all. *

Dear Bertha,
I’m reading more and  dusting less. I’m sitting in the yard and admiring the view without  fussing about the weeds in the   garden.  I’m spending more time with my family and friends and less time  working.
Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of  experiences to savor, not to endure. I’m trying to recognize these  moments now and cherish them.
I’m not “saving” anything; we use our good china and crystal for  every special event such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped,  or the first Amaryllis blossom.
I wear my good blazer to the  market. My theory is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for  one small bag of groceries. I’m not saving my good perfume for special  parties, but wearing it for clerks in the hardware store and tellers at  the bank.
“Someday” and “one of  these days” are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it’s worth seeing  or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it  now
I’m not sure what others would’ve done had they known  they wouldn’t be here for the tomorrow that we all take for granted. I  think they would have called family members and a few close friends.  They might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences  for past squabbles. I like to think they would have gone out for a  Chinese dinner or for whatever their favorite food was.
I’m  guessing; I’ll never know.
It’s those little things left undone  that would make me angry if I knew my hours were limited. Angry because  I hadn’t written certain letters that I intended to write one of these  days. Angry and sorry that I didn’t tell my husband  and parents often enough how much I truly love them. I’m trying  very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add  laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes,  tell myself that it is special.
Every day, every minute, every breath truly is  a gift from God.

Life  may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as  well dance

new habits

Technorati Tags: new years,resolutions,life,cats

i still need to work on my workout room, but its functional at this point. we bought a new television for the den before Christmas, and the beau got us a new playstation 3 for us for Christmas. so i put the old TV and playstation 2 in the workout room. this is working out nicely, because i can watch videos while i walk on the treadmill. even better, he gave me ‘Dark Shadows the lost episodes’ for Christmas too. 37 episodes on 4 discs. i used to watch Dark Shadows every day after school when i was a child. i didnt know there were any lost episodes, but apparently there are. they were shot first, before barnabas collins ever showed up in the story. its all about victoria winters, and how she came to collins port. so i watch an episode or two and walk after work, after the animals are all fed.

my mother sent us a couple of things for Christmas, along with a copy of her family line that a friend of hers put together for her. it isnt complete, but it does trace her family tree back several generations. i was surprised to find we have germans in our bloodline. its been interesting, but challenging, to find out about these people.

this spring im going to plant flowers in the front yard. ive had the seed packets for several years, but had no desire to plant anything at the old house. the yard there was so uninspiring. my yard is more inviting to me to work in, so im going to make the most of it. im going to paint the shutters black also. i dont really like the maroon. i cant wait!

i have also resolved to get gizmo declawed. i dont like the idea, and i would rather have a different course of action. but, he hasnt left me much choice. he really dislikes her for some reason. the problem is, he wont simply growl at her and leave it at that. oddly enough, i can leave all five cats in their room during the day and not ever find evidence of scuffles when i get home from work. but after we’re home, and everyone has been fed, if gizmo gets it in his head that he has been slighted by her in some way, he will stalk her till he gets her alone somewhere and attack her. the first time he did this she put him in his place, and we thought that would be the end of it. but he has carried a grudge over it, and has sought out opportunities ever since to rattle her cage but good. the last time was wednesday night, when he jumped on her and she couldnt get away. we broke it up before he was able to hurt her, but i think he was trying to. i spank him, i put him in the other cage for long time out, i scold him. it doesnt matter. he continues to do this. stubborn little boy he is. and he is the only cat we have that has clawed furniture, namely the bed. so, i must deal with this, and have his claws removed. he has left me no choice.

i will be getting my little table, that sits in the window alcove in the den, cleaned off and all the paperwork dealt with. and then keeping it that way. i used to be pretty disciplined with that sort of thing. i will be again.

i have lost about a third of the weight i want to drop, and kept it off through through the holidays.  now to drop the rest, and get toned up like i want. i use my treadmill, but havent been diligent to use the pilates machine i have. time to get after that too.

sammy has been doing well. not much to tell there. im just happy she is happy.

my son comes home from iraq in may, and plans to get out of the marines then. i believe they are going to move up north after that. they want to leave california because of the cost of living, and he wants to join the police force or sherrifs department. i think he will have some kind of retirement from the military. either way, im proud of him, but glad he is going to be a civilian again.

it looks to be a good year.

the whole point of Christmas

Technorati Tags: Christmas

Technorati Tags: Chrismas

i thought maybe it just didnt feel like Christmas this year. then i began to think, what exactly does Christmas feel like anyway? a kind of vague happy mood, because of all the decorations and lights, the traditional foods and eggnog, and cards in the mail? i have been giving this some thought.

from a Christian point of view, im expected to get all reverent and talk about how Christ was born and the gift God gave us and all that. truth is, i think about that all year. i dont associate the holiday trappings with the birth of my Lord on earth, even though i was raised as a catholic, and used to go to midnight mass every Christmas eve - which i loved, because i like celebrating that event. it just seemed to me like Christmas coincided with our little celebration of Jesus’ birth.

then there is the rest of it. the holly, the lights, the gift giving, and the dinner. it all can be fun, and pretty, but what exactly is the point? as a child, i thought the point was the gift giving. but really, there are so many traditions that stem from so many different sources, i guess the point now is just to have a holiday to celebrate. which is full circle from the early origins in the holiday, when people were celebrating the winter solstice, at which point the days again begin to get longer and the nights begin to get shorter. it seems even the people in the southern hemisphere have their winter holidays.

so it seems the whole point of having a holiday in the middle of winter is to relieve the winter blues, and give people something to look forward to. but Christmas isnt as much fun as it used to be. i dont think its because im grown up. i think its because the whole point has been obscured, at least here in america.

during the depression franklin roosevelt extended the shopping days to start the day after thanksgiving, to boost the economy. it was a good idea for the time. but it became a tradition in itself, a purely commercial tradition, because most retail stores do such a big part of their business between thanksgiving and Christmas. especially on black friday. i think, over time, it got pushed more and more, so that the focus of Christmas was on buying gifts, buying decorations, buying holiday food, buying everything. people get really stressed over getting their shopping done in time, and getting something for every one. its not fun. its work. its frustrating being stuck in traffic, having to weave through crowds of people, having to stand in long lines to pay for your stuff, just so you can go home and spend all evening wrapping presents.

i think im going to have fun, and enjoy a festive mood again. i wanted to shop this year instead of giving gift cards, and my plans were delayed two weeks because of the ice storm. the beau and i had to face the push of the crowds, something neither of us enjoy. but we managed to get through it unscathed, had a nice supper at quizno’s, and went home. the gifts will be new years gifts instead of Christmas gifts, but oh well. thats not the point.

the day the trees broke

Technorati Tags: ice storm,power outage,storm

it was exactly a week ago today i drank my last cup of the iced coffee i keep on hand. i didnt make anymore that morning, and regretted it later. it was pretty cold outside, and after a while it began to rain. i had spent saturday cleaning, and was settling in to enjoy a peaceful day at home. the beau was sleeping in, recovering from a wicked cold. it was nothing to compare to the wicked cold moving into the state.

soon the rain turned to ice rain, and began to coat the world outside. it wouldnt stop, and the ice began to build on anything with a surface. winter was here, and she was not in a pretty mood. even jack frost kept away as she swept her icy robes over everything in sight, over and over again. hour after hour the ice rain fell. by late afternoon there was about an inch or more of ice on everything. my house is in an old neighborhood, and we have some of the largest, oldest trees around, many having too much deadwood because no one seems to want to cut anything tree related. ‘theyre too pretty to cut’. not anymore theyre not.

thats when it started. first there was a loud cracking sound, as a branch began to splinter. then the horrendous crash as it fell. a few at first. then they began to come down all over. not just my neighborhood, or my city, but all across the state, and several others as well. i think my house must have been in the very eye of the storm, because we were hit the hardest, at least in tulsa, for broken trees and downed lines. oh yes, i forgot to mention the bright blue flashes magnified by the icy rains and clouds, the ones i thought were snow lightning. blue, green, and red flashes began to burst all over the skies. silly me. that was the transformers exploding as lines were ripped out when trees fell.

it was a very quiet storm, as storms go. except for the timbers breaking and falling, there was very little else to hear. no wind, oh thank You Jesus! wind would have taken us off the map. there were a few house fires, and several people killed or injured, but nothing like it would have been had there been wind. no, it was eerily silent other than the breaking trees, and the occasional car alarm.

the sound kept up through the night. by morning there was a different world out there. we ventured out to see if we could get to the beaus work. there were icy limbs and branches everywhere, although the streets were merely wet. there were lines down as well. we picked our way through this surreal environment like a character in a video game searching for a workable route. we made it, only to find out there was no power at his place of work. they sent everyone home after about 15 minutes. when we got home, there was no power at our house either.

there was no power anywhere.

250,000 people in tulsa alone were without power. across the state, closer to 1,000,000. very few escaped without losing their electricity. we spent monday at home, as most of my coworkers did too, although my clinic was open and the building, one of about five powered by the hospital generators, had power. the clinic did close early however, as only about three patients made it in.

we dont have a generator as a few on my block do, but were still better off than many. we have a gas fireplace, and a gas water heater, halogen flashlights, and a gas stove. we also only had a large treelike bush in one corner of the yard. it was snapped in half, but that was the only damage we sustained. God has blessed us with a very good choice of house. many of my neighbors had big trees in there yards. the old house, three blocks from our new house, had several huge tree. the operative word here is had.  the beautiful oak in the front yard is ruined, and the two huge trees in the back that always gave us problems, well they wont be giving anyone else problems now.

we had to ride it out for seven days. the president declared it a disaster area, releasing funds to bring in 2400 additional power workers, who pushed very hard to get everyone back up and running before the next storm - which skirted my town. my neighborhood was among the last to be restored, because it had the worst damages to lines. but saturday morning, as the beau was coming back from the laundromat, a fleet of five trucks followed him right to our house. i never saw such a beautiful set of trucks! by late afternoon, about 4:30 PM, there was the most welcome knock on the door, and the young man on the porch asked us if our main breaker was on. “well, turn it on, you have power now.”  i could have kissed him!

this morning the sky is brilliant blue, and the ice is long gone. im sitting here enjoying myself at the computer again, drinking fresh made coffee, and listening to the heater blowing warm air. we slept in our bed for the first time in seven days. we watched TV last night, and i vacuumed up much kitty litter. ah, the little joys of life.

i love winter, but she can sure be a harsh mistress at times.

click here for pictures

myriad of thoughts

Technorati Tags: tulsa river project

Technorati Tags: river project

stuff

i awoke this morning to icy rains. the leaves and branches are all glassy, crystalline, and the sky an even steel gray. thee are little icicles along anything with a straight edge. inside, my home is warm and cozy. in a little while i will shower, and make hot cereal for breakfast. i love mornings at home like this.

last night i talked with my daughter in law for a bit. her baby was due on the fourth of december, and still has not made her debut. if she doesnt deliver before then, she will be induced tuesday or thursday. i have asked the Lord to bring the baby before. i expect to hear today or tomorrow.

i still dont have my gifts bought and ready to send. now im getting antsy. maybe i will shop online, and have things shipped. but then you cant have things wrapped. i could bribe my mom to receive everything and wrap it for me …

 

river rants

last week i got the opportunity to say publicly something i had wanted to for some time. the radio station i listen to has tuesday ‘would you rather’ in the mornings while i am driving to work. tulsa started this arkansas river development issue some months ago, but the vote to get taxes to cover the cost didnt pass. so now its going to be funded privately, or by the smaller towns close to the river. the ‘would you rather’ question was, would you rather tulsa step up and develop the river, or the surrounding towns. i called the station with my opinion.

what i said was, i would like to see tulsa take care of the river project, but that i first on the agenda should be river clean up. i told the DJs how my beau used to work for a company that contracts out to sun oil, the refinery that sits on the bank of the river, to deploy boom to contain the natural oils that seeps up from the ground and casts a sheen on the water. this oil is natural, and has been seeping for thousands of years. its not really that hazardous. what is hazardous is the black hole, a ditch that comes from somewhere in the refinery that pours black, green and purple ooze into the river constantly. but they never put boom there, because it ‘doesnt exist’. i told them about the fish with bloody eyes and gills. i told them how sun would rather pay the fines for not being up to code, than fix the problems, because its cheaper. not wanting to take up too much time, i didnt tell them about the pink stuff that comes up from under the refinery every time it rains hard, stuff that was used in the refining process and is apparently in the ground now and is lighter than water so it rises when the water table rises and appears on the floors of the refinery, to be washed away into … you guessed it - the river. i didnt tell them how the flare towers, tall stacks that have flames at the top, for burning off the excess gases, flare really high at night, when the town sleeps, and how frequently the air reeks in the morning as far away as my house, a good six to ten miles away. i didnt tell them how easy it is to sneak onto the grounds, which i think is a bad security breach. not that i would know anything about that …

but i got to say enough for one comment. and they aired my entire comment. that was gratifying, to say the least. not that i expect sun oil, or sinclair oil, the other refinery also on the river bank, to change anything just from my comment. but maybe more people will become aware of the serious problem. maybe i will speak out again, since this river development issue is not dead. its not that my heart is in tulsa by any means. but people fish in this river all the time. their are endangered birds on a small island in this river right up by the refinery. the pollutants travel down river for other towns to reap the benefits from. i care about that.

Technorati Tags: pollution,tulsa,arkansas river,sun oil

randomizing

its saturday, and my second four day weekend in a row. i have a few more days vacation around Christmas, and then the year begins all over again. i like saturdays. the world opens up to me on saturday.

yesterday i washed the canine and feline kanji off the windows while the beau organized the computer room. he isnt done yet, but he made much progress. this room hadnt been really organized since we moved in, because we were focused on the rest of the house first.

nosomi is in the hallway singing to her plastic milk carton ring. she loves to carry it around and caterwaul. its ridiculously funny. the feline hierarchy has turned out as i predicted. thor loves her, and they play together all the time. gizmo doesnt like her, but he doesnt like any of the other cats too much. maggie sometimes likes her and attempts to play, and sometimes is her little psycho self and runs up at her, hisses, and runs off. nosi is likely to let out a most unearthly banshee screech at such times. usually late at night. cinnamon just keeps track of every one, and then wants to play with us.

i went out once yesterday to price an iron arch i had seen in a shop near here. it looks like a good item to make the head board i need so i can turn the bed diagonal in the bedroom. they are asking $249 for it. i am still considering it. its a black wrought iron, simple, and about the right size. i didnt measure it, although i probably should have. it looks right. a regular head board for a king sized bed will be too wide. the problem is how to attach it so it will be a back for the pillows, since the bed wont be flush up against the wall. hmmm …

the weather has finally gotten cold, and the sky this morning is overcast. much to my liking. its not that i dont like the sun. i just get tired of it. cloudy days offer a whole other feeling to the world. i welcome the cold as well. now i can get out my boots, my sweaters, and the long stockings that i love.

today i must tackle the remaining few boxes in the front room. with them cleared out, i can finally finish putting up mirrors and pictures, and get my workout room ordered to my liking. the beau probably thinks i have lost interest in my treadmill. but i havent. that, like everything else, has to have a routine for it. i am looking forward to getting this last thing done. pictures to come, of course.

i am pleased to say that i have maintained my 15lb loss of weight, and am about to shed more. i have a goal to reach 130lbs. i like that weight. one of my coworkers believes once you reach a certain age certain things have to happen. i do not subscribe to that thinking. i believe all things are possible to him who believes.

well, im off to my tasks.

horseback riding sunday

my friend ro, who i work with, has been after me to go riding with her for the last two years. for one reason or another it just has never worked out. until last sunday. we took cloud and jag, her two horses, and went across the road to the fields behind the medical center recently built, and had a wonderful ride. we rode about two hours, and would have ridden longer, but jag is a bit out of shape, and got quite a lather under the saddle. so, we headed back, washed off the horses, and went out for enchiladas. i had such a good time!

 

cloud and jag before the ride, and penny in the back.

 

rolane and cloud

 

my view on jag

 

there were a lot of ponds

cool tree

hosed off and rolling

stiff legged bonnie

Gods will

Gods will. there’s a controversial subject. many heated debates have ended unresolved over this one question of what Gods will is. i try to stay out of such arguments, but i have been faced with a few zealous brethren whose desire it was to straighten me out over certain matters. but it was too late for that, because i had already believed Gods word over traditional doctrine in those matters. well meaning people tend to get very upset if you dont agree with tradition over healing, prosperity, and protection. they will almost violently oppose the idea that, say, its always Gods will to heal. even though the Bible teaches this, and Jesus demonstrated it.

i have never been very religious. i would rather know what i believe, and know why i believe it. its like building on a rock. rain cant wash it away from under you, and wind cant blow you off it. so when i first began to see people drawing conclusions about Gods will based on past events and circumstance, and mostly guessing and speculating about what His will is, i knew i couldnt go through life that way. i had already settled it in my heart that the Bible is Gods word. it stood to reason, then, that His will would match His word.

the first thing i asked to know about was healing. was it always His will, or was it ever His will? i saw a lot of sick ‘believers’. immediately my mind went to the gospels, and the scriptures that quoted Jesus as saying ‘if you have seen me, you have seen the Father. I do as I see Him do’. ok, so i looked for examples of Jesus not healing some one, saying God wanted to teach them something from the sickness. i couldnt find any. every time someone came to Him for healing, He healed them.

i also asked Him if He really allowed the devil to teach us things. i was willing to submit to it, if it was how He wanted to do things. again He led me to three scriptures.

• first was colossians 2:15, which says that Christ spoiled principalities and made a spectacle of them publicly. in those days, when you conquered and enemy, it wasnt uncommon to parade them in cages to show your dominion over them.
• second was hebrews 2:14, which says Christ became flesh like us, in order to destroy him who had the power of death. the word used means to render entirely idle.
• third was 1 john 3:8, which says Christ also destroyed the works of the devil. the word used here means to loosen, like loosening ties in such a way they cant be used again.

then He asked me if He so dealt with the devil, and then also gave me authority over him, why would He then ‘allow’ the devil to do anything to me? in fact, how could He, if He already gave me authority over the devil? well the answer is He doesnt and He cant.

there is a lot more i can say about all this. a lot more. i have a post brewing about the book of job, which i will be writing soon.

but i just wanted wanted to say here that i have reasons for what i believe. i dont just take up a teaching  because i like the teacher. it has to be true. there has to be something solid to put my feet on. it has to more than feel right, or seem to make sense, for me. neither do i try to make the scripture fit my world.

i decided a long time ago that the word of God was the final authority. it is what God thinks, what He has done, and what He believes. it is also my covenant of blood with Him. it always works.